Schools Back.. Skerred.

In my youth I decided that university wasn’t for me. I wanted to see the world. To live in another country. To Fly Like An Eagle. That’s exactly what I did. After an extended time overseas, I finally came back to Australia for good, in 2004. I met a guy, married, worked, had three kids…. For that reason, my university journey is taking shape in my late thirties, instead of my teens.

Tomorrow, the kids go back to school for term 3. A welcomed return for me (not so much for them, because helloooo…homework – YUK!)

It’s also a week until I return to university. After having studied online for a few years (and getting nowhere thanks to not getting cross-credits) I have found that on-campus is definitely the best way for me to study successfully. The only problem is I have mild social anxiety. I do not like crowds, and I do not like being around a lot of strangers. Whenever I think about having to go in to the campus I am a combination of excitement to be learning new things, and sick to my stomach because..people.

I’m trying not to acknowledge my anxiety and nerves, but they are creeping up, sitting on my chest and pressing down so much that I can physically feel it change the way I breathe.

I don’t have any ‘university friends’ as last semester I was doing a couple of mandatory subjects that were aimed at a cross section of courses, thus not strictly in my ‘field of study’. Also, I’m not good at making friends. I love being friends. I love having people in my community, but I’m so awkward when it comes to making them. I have a knack of being really quiet and observant, until I know you. Once I do know you though, look out! You’ll never get me to shut up! It’s hard, but I’m going to try to reach out this semester.

Anywho, I’ve managed my anxiety with diet and exercise for awhile now, however my exercise has slipped. My diet isn’t terrible, and I try to stick to Gluten Free, Wheat Free as much as I possibly allow myself. I certainly don’t beat myself up when I do eat a spoonful of Nutella, but I am aware it will affect me. In the past I have seen marked improvements through exercise. Something I have learned is that I really need to do a ‘type’ of movement every day. If I don’t do it every day, my body becomes a blob. Yesterday I had great intentions of going out for a run (jog/walk/shuffle – let’s face it, what I do isn’t graceful, but it is out there!) I had on all the gear and then bam… throughout the day, my mind talked me out of going. I didn’t do it. Complete regret. Why didn’t I just lace up the shoes and go? I KNOW I’ll feel better. It’s like I self-sabotage myself by not doing it. Self-talk is huge. How you talk to yourself reflects on how you put your own energy into the world. I also believe that you can change the way you think by being conscious of the how you speak to yourself. Being present, and listening. I’ll listen to Benedict…because he knows…


Anywho, this week I am committing to three thirty minute runs (and anything above that is a bonus!). I am also starting back at dance class this week, which I thoroughly enjoy. So, whilst the anxiety is creeping up, and I’m feeling panicky, and scared to return to school, I am also going to commit to getting out and exercising, as well as being kind to myself. Because really, in the end, being kind to yourself really does matter. Regardless of my ‘friend count’ I know that I am important, and I matter.

***Shout Out to a wonderful online community. I’ve written about them before. They are known as Operation Move. A true Sisterhood. If you are into being around positive women, who uplift, encourage, and inspire, then they are your community! Come over and check them out on Facebook! I’m fairly certain that without them I wouldn’t believe in myself half as much, and I certainly wouldn’t have the confidence to move as much.***

When you don’t meet a challenge have you failed?

Recently I took part in an 80 day fitness challenge.

The idea was the exercise/move every day for 80 days in a row. Before you think that the idea is insane and rest days are important, one of the options was stretching, which worked well for ‘rest days’. It was also a fundraiser for a wonderful woman raising money for Cancer research.

I went into the challenge full of enthusiasm and had planned out a countdown of days. It looked intimidating, but totally achievable. I enjoyed moving every day, and at the beginning of the week I would set out my days and what movements I would be doing. I used YouTube a lot and am so addicted to “The Fitness Blender” and all their workouts. I got stuck into the kettlebells and the DOMS were feeling good. By about day 25 I started to feel stronger, and better. The online support group was great, and it was good to go in and celebrate movements.

There was an element of nutrition that came into it, such as introducing more fruit and veg, which I eat anyway, and trying to cut back on alchohol..bonboooong.. THIS one may have definitely was my demise with seeing complete improvement.

We planned a trip away for the weekend for my eldest, who turned 8. That’s when it all headed south (literally). I believe it was around day 52. We spent the weekend away and I didn’t make it a priority. That‘s basically what it comes down to. Poor planning meant that I neglected to do any movement, thus disqualifying me from the challenge.

Now..there are two ways this could go. I miss a couple of days, pick myself back up and keep going with moving every day (because I genuinely enjoyed the feeling!) Or…. drop it and forget all about it. Going back to old habits and neglecting what made me feel good. You can guess which one happened. I fell apart. All the planning, all the moving. It stopped. Do I regret it? I don’t regret it, because I feel it’s a genuine lesson. I think the lesson I needed is to keep small goals in mind. Not grand ones. Think small, achieve big. I was able to go for 52 moving EVERY day. That is HuGE. To me, that is an achievement I should celebrate. So.. I am celebrating the fact that I was able to meet part of a challenge, and whilst I didn’t complete it to get a ‘medal’ at the end, I know that I’ve learned an extremely important lesson to me.

Starting today, I am going to plan one week ahead. No further. I will write out my workout/moving plans and stick to them. I will celebrate small victories and although the bigger picture will always be hanging on the wall, I will choose to look at the snapshots that will create good habits, and allow me to continue on a journey of life, love, health, and everything in  between.

Do you have any favourite YouTube workouts? Do you have a secret to motivation? Is it motivation, or is it planning?

Our Friendship Goes The (Running) Distance…

I have a little sister, her name is Lola.. Oh wait..hang on… wrong opening line!!

Actually, I have a little friend, her name is D….. and I lub her very much!

D and I have been friends for a little while now (thank you social media!) and we have a common interest (among many) of running. She introduced me to the wonderful, supportive, online group Operation Move and I haven’t looked back! Recently I flew up to see her for a visit, but also because she had convinced me to sign up for the Tour De Tambourine 10K run! Talk about crazy!!!

Flying to Queensland, I got off the plane and was immediately wrapped in a warm blanket of lov…..no, not love…it was humidity!! Oh My!!! That stuff is thick..and sticky!! Not used to that at all, but yay… Queensland.

Leading up to November, D and I had undertaken a 12 week training program with Operation Move, but had completed the training a few weeks before. Both of us were a little struggling with fitness, and decided we’d just spend this run as a fun run, not for any record times. This is why I think, and want to absolutely stress…. running with friends makes it fun!!!! I know that running can be a wonderful, individual time out from anybody (mostly the kids), pushing yourself to get your pace and fastest time, but running with a friend (my first time!) was soooo much fun!

tourdetamboWe picked up our race packets (so easy!) and I was so surprised that it had MY NAME on it!!! I was so bloody excited that I forgot I’d be pushing through 10k the next day!!!!

tambofriends

You know how running can be a mind game, and there is no “only” about it..if you do 1km, you do 1km, no matter how slow you go?! Well the lady who took our photos asked what distance we were doing and I made the mistake of saying “Only 10k”…both her and D corrected me, that it’s not just “only”….. remember that… no matter the distance, it counts! She also said to us “The Journey is Now” … that was really sweet. All the hard work we put in, and maybe the work we didn’t, now mattered! Not much else to do, we relaxed and drank coffee… a staple in our diet… and friendship!

We had a yummy Indian dinner, go check out the restaurant Masala Shanti if you’re ever there!

Race Day Ready …. lucky for the band aids in the cars first aid kit! I have a tricky little toe and without band aids I’m not sure I’d have a toe left …hah. tambostuffHow good does the Operation Move shirt look?? So incredibly honoured and proud to be able to wear it. This wonderful, online group of women prove every day that you can be all shapes, sizes, and ages to succeed, just by Moving!

tambocoffee

Mandatory Pre-Race Coffee It’s good for the lungs…seriously!

The event was well set up, and a great course. The only downfall, the lack of photographers on the course (We’d even discussed our photographic poses in the week leading up to the event!), and few marshals around the outer parts of the course (Oh, and the lack of bling *sob*) …Apart from that, it was a top notch event. Lots of hydration stations, although the water spraying we got at the end would have gone well throughout the course!!!
Since there were no photographers, it was lots of runfies and selfies!! So Much Fun! Going up

The hills...so many hills!!!

The hills…so many hills!!!

the hills killed, going down the hills..not so much! It was also nice to see other people out on the course from Running Mums Australia who were very supportive of their team mate who was walking/jogging with injury..I swear they clocked up heaps more mileage through doubling back!

The running community I’ve been able to witness really is a great one. As long as you’re out

ONE MORE KILOMETRE TO GO...we can do it (just don't stop on a hill - that was the advice of a pro running past us!)

ONE MORE KILOMETRE TO GO…we can do it (just don’t stop on a hill – that was the advice of a pro running past us!)

there – running, jogging, shuffling, or briskly walking…you’re a part of a super global community! There’s always someone there to encourage you to keep going, and someone letting you know you’re doing a great job, even if you’re internally struggling!

We finally got to the finish line and crossed over at the EXACT same time!!! *all of the smiles*

tambofinish

WE DID IT! …And all we got was a wrist band! I wore the ShIT outta that wrist band the next day! But seriously..we did it!!!

I’m so glad I got to go to QLD and run an event with a friend. No record for finishing. But it was all about the friendship, and going the distance.

I’m so glad that D is in my life. I’m so glad that she is my friend. Although we live in different states, our souls are still entwined.

The End.

Kara-Goucher

I apologise ….

I’ve had something on my mind for the past couple of days. Ever since I heard about the English cricketer who has gone home from the Ashes with stress-related illness. It can happen to anyone. And it does.  This is my post in response to that (which is actually pretty unrelated)…..

I think I need to make an apology. What for? You might ask… You see, at the beginning of this year I was traveling a very dark path. There were no streetlights, and there was no end. There was a street sign with the name of the street, but you would have to look really hard to read it because it was so dark. When I looked forward, there was no hope; There was no future. I was at a crossroads and they were marked Depression Rd and Anxiety Way.  The thing is…there were so many things happening in my life, in my head, and I had no way of filtering them, of sorting them out, and getting through them. From the outside looking in, it probably seemed as if I had it all. I had a husband, a home, 3 beautiful children, a stable income and a car. I was studying at uni and there was sunshine in the sky. That’s where my apology comes in. The sun wasn’t shining for me.  I locked myself away, and didn’t come out at all. I would drop the kids off to school without getting out of the car, so that I didn’t have to talk to anyone, or didn’t have to get out of my pajamas. I declined every invitation to get together and socialize because I didn’t know what to talk about, and I didn’t want to leak my sour mood onto anyone else. I didn’t want to get out of bed, and would quite often go straight back to bed as soon as I returned from school drop off. Only now, now that I am finally at the end of those streets and finally walking along It Gets Better Street do I realize, by doing this, I had the potential to jeopardize friendships I’d had for months/years. To the outsider who doesn’t know, my behavior could be perceived as uppity, and snobbish. As if I was acting like I was too good to talk to anyone. Or to good to go out and share a meal and have a drink.  The problem is. That’s not the truth. The truth is that when you are in the deepest parts of depression, nothing seems appealing. Hiding in my house all day. Looking things up on the internet. Getting lost in books. Watching tv without even seeing it. Those were all the things I was stuck in. It was like a loop and I couldn’t stop it from happening.  Just the thought of having to talk to people would cause a physical reaction and I’d cry. I couldn’t breathe at the thought someone would talk to me. I know that a lot of people suffer in silence. They don’t want to burden anyone with how they are feeling, and what they are going through. That’s exactly where I was.

If not for a couple of friends who gently persisted on being a friend and never giving up, I would still be in that pit of despair. They listened without judgement, they asked questions, and they were there, often just through a small phone screen. So……to all the people in my life, both on screen and off who felt the brunt of my struggles. I am sorry. I’m sorry if I bought you down. I’m sorry if I ignored you. I’m sorry if you thought I didn’t value our friendship, because I do. I do so very much.  There may be nothing that can turn things around, but just know… everyone has their journey they’re traveling. Sometimes it just takes one friend to ask the question and make sure everything is okay. Just be there. Be present. Know it’s not personal, it’s the person.

I also want those people who may be reading this and are still walking along those Roads and Paths marked with lights that have blown out… I am here for you, and you will get to the end of it. It might not happen tomorrow, it might. Either way, you are not alone. Never, ever, ever…. And remember YOU ARE IMPORTANT.. even if you don’t believe it.

 

IF you’d like to know more about how I was able to turn myself onto a better path please feel free to ask. I’m more than happy to share my story. It might just be similar to yours!  You can email me at sydneygen04@yahoo.com

I don’t think my journey is over yet, in fact I know it’s not, but I am glad to see a lot more streetlights burning bright. Let’s turn some on for you, too!

R U OK? – It’s OK To Say NO

Today is once again, R U OK day in Australia. This initiative started as a movement to raise awareness and open channels to help people struggling with life. According to the RUOK website www.RUOKDAY.com:

The R U OK? Foundation is a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to encouraging all people to regularly and meaningfully ask ‘are you ok?’ to support those struggling with life.

R U OK?Day is our national day of action on the second Thursday of September (12 September 2013), and dedicated to reminding people to regularly check in with family and friends. We also have Resources for You to use throughout the year to help you ask ‘are you ok?’ regularly of family, friends and colleagues.    Stephen Fry

You might remember that last year I wrote a blog post about it, and at the time, I was NOT OK. You can read all about the reasons here: R U OK 2012.

Since then I have had many struggles, up and down, and I am still working through them, but for today, I can say, “I am OK”. Who knows what tomorrow brings. My anxiety peaks and waves, comes and goes. Some days I feel like I can conquer the world, and some days I feel like I want to hide out in my room all day and not talk to anyone.

The reason I’m bringing this up is because I want to ask YOU the question: ARE YOU OK? R U OK? ARE YOU ALRIGHT? Nothing is ever black, and white. I know nothing can ever be solved with a cup of tea, but it sure can ease a burden! Let me be your tea-maker. I am HERE for you. I will listen, I will not judge, and I will not set out to solve the worlds problems. Sometimes all you want is a friend to listen and acknowledge, not judge, not try to solve the issues, or tell you where you might be going wrong. I am your friend.

Not AloneIf you don’t want to talk to me, just know that You are NOT alone. With the progress in social media and the access we all have to the internet, I have found that you are open to a world of opportunity and hope. If you have anxiety about being in public situations, you can be comfortable in your own home and reach out. If you don’t like the way you look and it makes you depressed, you can be behind a computer screen asking for advice. You don’t have to put yourself in situations that may cause you to be even more “not OK”.

So, today, at this point in time, why am I feeling OK? I think it has something to do with finally seeing a psychologist. It took me a couple of goes, and it’s not always first one is the best choice, but the one I have been seeing was not trying to read my head, or solve the worlds problems of why I am the way I am. We were simply letting it be and working with how we can work with that. It’s hard work, and it’s not all roses and sunshine, but the one thing I have learned is, FriendsEveryone needs someone to talk to. By talking about my issues with someone who was non-judgmental, my whole attitude changed. I’m no longer holding onto feelings inside myself, and no longer taking it out on my loved ones. Again, not always having great days, and yes I regress, but I know that I’m getting better. You can too. All you need to do is ask the question.

I hope you are aware that you are not alone. You will be OK. There is help available. If you go to one doctor and they say they don’t believe in ‘depression/anxiety’ then go to a different doctor. Start doing Yoga (I know it sounds naff, but it did help me!). Start exercising, even just a 15 minute walk outside in the fresh air will clear your mind and help.  If you want to send me a private message, then please do. My email is: sydneygen04@yahoo.com .

I’ve listed some resources that you can go and check out and maybe gain a little further information and maybe some help?

Take-The-First-Step

RESOURCES:

Beyond Blue

R U OK Day

Dancing with the Black Dog – A blog

and just remember:

You__ve_got_a_friend_in_me__by_pocket_full_of_posy

Doing Things I Said I Would Never Do….

So basically, I’ve gone and done TWO things I said I’d never do!

ONE: I joined a gym (and I’ve been going!!!!)

TWO: I have been running on the treadmill (and not hating it!)

Slinky on a Treadmill
Slinky on a Treadmill…. your argument is invalid…

We’ve recently had one of those 24 hour gyms open in the neighbourhood and I know a lot of people who have joined it. I always said, “Oh I can’t join a gym, I’ve got no time..or … What would I do with the kids? By the time it’s evening, I’m stuffed!!”  So when I saw another local gym set up a booth at the local shopping centre I was intrigued… because the big sign said “LADIES ONLY AREA” and “CHILD MINDING” … ding ding ding!!! Two definite things that have always made me err at the thought of a gym. I curiously went up and spoke to the girl, and was surprised at all they were offering! Some great deals on joining, no need to pay until Spring, child minding included, reasonable hours, good location, classes at perfect times, and NOT THAT Expensive!!!!  If ever I was looking for a sign, I thought I’d found it! I took the information and went home to discuss with my husband. It would be a decision that needed to be jointly made, and the budget adjusted accordingly. He was very supportive and agreed I should go for it! So, a couple of days later I signed up! That was Friday… I was excited to get rid of the excess 10kg I’ve put on in the last year (gasp…yup….I’ve let myself slip A LOT!). I want to fit back into the jeans I have just waiting to be worn!! I want to feel better, and to not be so lethargic.I started on Monday, and besides a minor hiccup yesterday (Wednesday) of dropping a ceramic bowl on my toe and my knee being sore from a little hyper extension on the elliptical (btw elliptical, we are no longer friends) I have been going every day, straight after school drop off, so there’s no excuses!! The girls enjoy going to the children’s corner and it has everything they could want or need, including a friend they already know!!!

That brings me to the number two thing. I always said Treadmills were boring… I guess I said that when it wasn’t Winter, and it wasn’t cold and rainy outside!!!! I’ve eased back into my running by starting the C2K program (Couch to 5km) although I skipped straight to week 2. I’m not a hater of the treadmill anymore, and I know that once I’ve shed a few kilos and not as heavy, I’ll feel much better about hitting the road again. I still like being outdoors, and feel I run farther when I am, but for the meantime, I’ll use the nice cosy gym ones (equipped with tvs and internet!!).

What I look like - funny running picture

So there you go. I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone and I’m gymming it. I haven’t even been to the ladies area yet! I’ve done some ab work in the general area, and just stayed in my little zone!! Everyone is there for the same reason, so yeah… I don’t even care!  Hopefully, in a months time I’ll start seeing significant changes. My mind is already starting to swirl itself back into possibilities. Making things a lot clearer. I’m excited again. I have my fitness eval and program write up next week… then we can get onto some strength activities, as well as losing the fat! Now.. if I could JUST get onto that housework that forever evades me.. or do I evade it?!!

In other news.. I have “The Greatest Athlete” obstacle course coming up next weekend. I’m scared witless!! It’s going to be fun, but Oh My!!!! Definitely the “weekend warrior” here! I’m also pretty pumped about the following weekend when the WHOLE family completes the The Swisse Color Run ! Hubby and I did it last year and had a load of fun throwing colour at each other, we thought this year it would be fun to take the kids and let them have fun too!! I’m off to get some ‘goggles’ for the girls and maybe a drop sheet for the double jogger pram!? I’ll update with pics once these events have happened!! In the mean time…. thanks for reading!

Be Safe – Sparkle & Shine – Be Happy

Emazoning it…. Learning to walk before I run

This week has been a topsy-turvy week in the SydneyGen world of things-that-happen…..

Our youngest has been hit with a horrible sickness, and her usual vibrant self is nowhere to be seen. It’s taken 2 doctors visits to finally diagnose tonsillitis, so with the proper medication, I’m hoping we all get some sleep relief soon! Speaking of sleep…. an interesting thing happened to me last night.

I attended a free (absolute BARGAIN) one and a half hour session with Emazon (Stand Your Ground) thanks to the wonderful girls at Designed 2 Fit gym.  If you haven’t heard of Emazon before, she’s been on The Biggest Loser, and Australia’s Next Top Model. From her website: Emazon travels the country as a keynote speaker, presenter and coach. STAND YOUR GROUND is the renowned mind body workshop that has toured the country for over 5 years. A provocative and unconventional insight into our health, weightloss, self image, personal authority and self destructive behaviours.

Anywho… for an hour I got to put on some very cool red wrist wraps, that immediately got me into the ‘zone’ and belt out some boxing and get my mind into some focus points.. basically, I got to forget about the world and my life for an hour and a half. Whilst I really enjoyed the boxing aspect of it, and the way that Emazon made you micro focus, I got the most of the session at the end. She ran us through a breathing technique and relaxation, which of course I loved, as it w photo IMG_5234_zpsb9ac3a6a.jpgas very yoga-esque. Then, she spoke to us about some ‘techy stuff’ to do with our bodies, brains and functioning. As she was speaking I was listening and nodding along. Everything she was saying I was thinking, “yes, yes, yes that’s me, yes” … I don’t get enough sleep. I don’t sleep at the optimum times, I don’t handle my body correctly, and I’ve definitely done too much too fast in everything, to be able to maintain a proper, consistent form of living and weight loss.  I asked a question about how “us mothers with young ones” are supposed to get the “eight hours” sleep, when it’s a fantasy. The answer wasn’t as complicated as I thought. If I can’t get the eight hours, then it’s more beneficial for me to be asleep between 10pm-1am in the ‘deepest’ part of sleep. That means I start a going-to-bed ritual a lot earlier than I usually do. I turn off technology, I calm my brain down, and make it a habit to sleep sooner, rather than later. Surely that can’t be too hard!!

At the moment, I’m really unhappy with how I feel I’ve let myself go. In the last year I’ve gained 10kgs and I can feel every little bit of it. Interestingly though, instead of thinking I have to go hell-for-leather and start immediately.. it was pointed out, that in order for our bodies to not rebel on us, or go into shock, we have to ease into things. So, with that in mind, I am not jumping straight onto the 1200 calorie eating plan again, I am not going to attempt to run 8kms again, instead… I’m going to slowly ease my calories down to 1200 over the next two weeks, and I’m going to start walking as much as I can. This is my ‘say it out loud’ and I’m hoping you’ll hold me accountable!

I was very lucky to have a wonderful stranger gift me a ‘group session’ that she had won in the lucky door prize. I thought I was going to cry!! It’s those small things that need to push me. Last night I saw some people I hadn’t seen in a very long time, it was like a mini 12wbt reunion. I was so happy seeing them, and realised that by isolating myself, and not seeing them I have not been ‘surrounding myself with things that help’ … These were girls I climbed the highest mountain with (literally) and they’re the type of people who will gently push and encourage and you listen, because they’re going through exactly the same thing you are! So in saying that. I am also going to work out how I can afford regular gym sessions, one-on-ones and group training.  I’d love to go to the Emazon convention in October, but some things are beyond reach… for now.

emazon

Middle and Center for the Team Photo!!

Err so what was this post all about then? Ummm.. it was just me wanting to express that A: I don’t like the way I am right now. B: I know I can change this. C: I will change myself slowly and surely. D: I recommend you look up Emazon and check her out. E: The girls at Designed 2 Fit are awesome. F: I will surround myself with people that help me be the best version I can be. G: Tonsillitis in littlies sucks H: I don’t need to get through the whole alphabet because this post is long enough.

Until next time….  Stand Proud and JUST Be the Best You Can Be!

Chalk Boards & Goals

50s-wife-list-1

 

Hi There!

Long time, no post! I have been super duper busy, and neglected this little site for too long! It’s time to come back and try to make it a regular update again!

So.. this post is all about goal setting. I tend to be extreme. I either go all in with something, or I just go .. meh.
One of these things seems to be goal setting. When I did my first round of 12wbt I noticed goal setting was super important, and because I was so determined to reach some goals, I did go all in. The results spoke for themselves, so I’ve often wondered why I haven’t had much success since then. It’s obvious! I hadn’t been setting achievable goals!

I recently purchased a tin of ‘blackboard’ paint from Aldi. A super awesome buy that I was going to use to repaint the kids chalkboard that had been decorated with textas! I was pretty much addicted from the get go! I kind of wanted to paint my whole house in it so I could draw all over it!! Pretty sure hubby wouldn’t be up for that!! haha! So, I found a piece of board that goes to the kids whiteboard and decided I’d paint that. I was going to use it as a shopping list, but then I had a thought… what if I used it every day and put some small, yet achievable goals to work towards. I decided that they weren’t going to be ‘set in stone’ (obviously, it’s a chalkboard, not stone!!) and if I didn’t get ALL of them done in a day, it wasn’t going to be tragic. Like I said, I tend to be a high achiever and go all in, and then get disappointed if it doesn’t work out….

The results have been cathartic. Every day I get up and think about the goals I’d like to do today. Some are practical, some are fun, and some are to do with house stuff. Mainly though, they are reminders for me. Something for me to pass by and say “Oh, that’s right, I was going to do that today!”
I’m posting these via Instagram at the moment. Feel free to find and follow me if you’re not already – I’m at SydneyGen .. I’ve also posted them below, to give you an idea of what sort of goals I’m setting. I’d love to hear about your goals, how you think about them, set them, achieve them? What do you think is important? Leave me a comment!!!

P.S You’ll notice on one of them that there is a word “WOOF” and a picture of a “pocket with a sunshine poking out” .. this was on the weekend, when I neglected my poor chalk board. I soon came to discover, that if I didn’t set myself some goals, no matter what they were, the black dog decided to snuggle up for awhile. To me, this reaffirmed the need to give myself direction, in order to move forward!!! Lesson learned!

Weighing in and running for it

Image

Things are going well in discovery land, every day is a new day and I need to keep pushing through temptations and trying to make the right choices.

No, I don’t need that cookie at Mrs Fields’, even if it’s called a “nibbler”, how harmful could it be?? I didn’t choose to find out! I was standing longingly at the counter having an internal debate about it being ‘okay’ if I just got one with a coffee. Lucky for me, I’d just been in a few stores and tried on some clothes, fitting into mediums and size 12 dresses!!!! This gave me enough confirmation to walk away, so I did. My hips thank me for it, but even better, the scales today reflected the decision.

Today I jumped on the scales and it’s official! 71.0kgs! (156.2lbs) which makes it an 18kilo loss so far!! My original goal for 12 months was 15-20 kilos, so we’re well on the way to surpassing goals! I also measured myself from the end of the last round and I’ve lost 8cms, mostly off the hips (that’s a very good thing!!!) I started this journey back in September and it has well and truly changed my life and who I am.

I’m hoping, for the sake of myself, that it hasn’t changed me too much. I’ve noticed that I’m always thinking about nutrition and exercise, but I have so many interests that I’ve been losing focus. For example, I haven’t done any creative writing in over a month. This makes me sad. When you’re living a ‘healthy’ lifestyle, or you’re trying to lose weight, you tend to concentrate and start to prioritize in regards to how to go about it. Unfortunately, I’ve neglected to prioritize the other things I love to do too. I must make a conscious effort to do this from now on.

I’ve been doing my dedication run this week and managed to run out another 19kms since my last blog post. I’ve only got 14 to go to have achieved the 45kms nominated. I have honestly found that having to be accountable has pushed me that little bit further, so to everyone that ‘liked’ and ‘commented’ to get me there, I thank you! The kms were for me, but they were also for you! I have a training schedule for a half marathon in 10 weeks that I’m trying to stick to. If I can stick to it, I’ll participate in the Canberra half marathon in April. I’m going to reassess my progress in about 4 weeks and see whether I should enter the 10km or go for broke! Wish me luck!

I’ve been contemplating the next step in my weight loss journey. Last night I was on the bed and pushing through the doona of fat on my belly and contracting my muscles. I was super excited that I could actually feeling my abs contracting every time I squeezed! Don’t get me wrong or let me mislead you, there is still a big belly in the way, and a layer of fat keeping everything nice and snuggly, but the fact that I could feel ‘something’ under there made me focused and determined to not stray from goals.

I have to say, I am determined and I am focused, but I am also very easily understanding how a person can to a point and think that “Oh well, I’ve already lost a bunch of weight, I can give myself a leeway every now and then.” For that I give myself a huge mental and physical slap and remember what it’s taken me to get here. When ‘they’ say blood, sweat and tears, ‘they’ weren’t lying! I’ve been on this journey for six months now and I can’t believe the changes taking place. I just have to remember that. If you have a day where you may stray, pick back up and move along. Just don’t make every day a stray day!

I have to sign up for the next round of the 12WBT and am still contemplating what I’m going to do. I am 2kgs away from my original 69kg goal, but to be in the ‘healthy’ BMI I think I need to be 65ish. I was thinking of doing the Lean and Fit program. I want to keep running, it’s definitely a mind clearer and sense of achievement every time I complete a run, but I also want to start getting stronger. I have limited upper body strength and my core needs more work! If you’ve done these rounds, or have experience with these type of programs I’d love to hear from you. I definitely need to work on the preggy belly and get those abs out and proud!!!

If you’ve never run before and you’d like to give it a try, I’d highly recommend the C25K program, that’s Couch to 5 km.  It will set you up to be running in no time! It starts out nice and easy and very achievable. If you’re an iPhone app freak, you can also download the app from iTunes to help you along! I’d love to hear if you’ve started this, how you’re going with it and what you’re getting out of it, if you start it or have done it!

For everyone doing pre-season of 12WBT let me know how you’re going with it! I’m excited to hear the new journeys and the return journeys!

Until next time! Be Safe and Stay Pretty everyone! Thanks for reading!

Dedicating my Kms

It’s been a while since I’ve been here. Holiday season and all that!??! who knows, anywho it’s a new year which means it’s back to the path to a new me. New Year – New Theme, hope you like it!

When I left you I had lost 15 kilos and had gone from 89kgs to 74kgs. A huge achievement considering I had set that 15 goal for 6 months!! Over the last month I feel as though I’ve been losing focus slowly, although the lessons I’ve learned along the way have never truly left my mind. I think that has helped to overcome some of the fear that I would revert to old ways and gain, gain, gain!

During the time away from blogging I had a great little break with friends in Canberra and also had such a wonderful birthday! I decided that it was my birthday and I was going to give myself the best gift of no stress! It’s amazing how even when I gave myself this freedom and took the pressure off, I didn’t feel the need to go absolutely crazy! We saw We Bought a Zoo (Highly HIGHLY recommended!), enjoyed a beautiful mexican dinner and indulged in some delicious cocktails (Oh how I miss those empty calorific drinks!!)

Made with Love

Birthday Breakfast - One indulgence on a special day is acceptable - right!?!!!

A couple of days after my birthday I met up with a few fellow Sydney 12WBTers and we embarked on a bush walk in the Blue Mountains. It was a great day for it and although I didn’t do as many calories as I truly thought I would, it was a very enjoyable couple of hours and a wonderful achievement when we made it to the end!!!

So Many Steps!!!!

So that bought me to the next stage of getting these grams gone! I needed to find some additional motivation. I saw a post on Facebook by Jayne (a fellow 12Wbter) who had said she will dedicate 1km to each LIKE she got on her status. I was watching her numbers climb, climb, climb and thought, hmmm this might be a good idea, except there’s no way I’m going to get around to do over 60kms!!! So I set a few guidelines and asked my Facebook friends to help me start running again. I said I’d dedicate a km to each of them. In the end I got 41 people = 41kms, and I added the family to make it 45! I’ve started the runs, but must remember to try to get out there early as the summer heat is a killer!!

With everything I do, I need accountability so I’ve got the pics to prove it!! I’m 12kms down and each time I’m managing to improve the time.

Steady as she goes, isn’t that the saying? It’s definitely what I’m doing! I enjoy running, although I struggle sometimes, I just love being outside and

being able to clear my head. I saw this image on Facebook and it gave me such a chuckle that I had to share, for all those that feel they may not be able to do it, or I’m sure there’s a few of you who can relate…

Every day is not always roses and is not always great, and there have been many times where I’ve felt that I’ve been straying on the path of focus and achieving. I think our biggest critic is ourselves and that I need to work on a lot of things with my inner self so that I can have them reflect on my new outer self. There are many days where I still can’t see the huge amount of weight loss that I’ve achieved. I think it’s because I’ve spent so many years as the way I was? I’m not sure. I weighed in today and was down from 74kgs back from my last post to 71.9kgs!! Through all the small efforts and staying consistent within my limits and boundaries I am leading myself to success. I just need my mind to catch up! There are also times where I think ‘Wow, have I really done that?’….looking at those numbers, I am only 2.9kgs away from a 20kg loss!! Twenty freakin kilos? That’s just madness! That’s my 4 1/2 year old!! Anyway, I think I’m rambling now!!! I’ll leave you with another great capture I got from Facebook. I love Mish and everything she has helped me achieve, but I also love Jillian Micheals, and on her Facebook the other day she said something that I really needed to see and read at that very exact moment (the world works in those weird ways, hey?!)

Remember to believe in yourself and you will achieve. Thanks for reading, I hope to hear from you all and would love to know how you all spent your holidays and what fun things you did?!

Finale Celebrations and In Between Weigh Ins

Hi All!

I haven’t posted about last weeks finale celebrations because I wasn’t sure how to put everything into words (I know right, me…not knowing how to put things into words?!?!)

Basically, it was amazing, inspiring, fun and an opportunity of a lifetime.

Through the generosity of Mum looking after the kids and a ride in from a fellow 12WBTer  (thanks Sue!) I was able to attend the Finale Workout at Centennial Park. I was among 1000+ other people, celebrating our 12 week achievements!!!! It was an amazing vibe and there was so much passion and happiness in the air. Wearing my purple “Sydney crew” singlet it was great to be able to identify fellow Sydneysiders and say Hello to them and introduce myself, even if I’ve never met them before.

I thought the best way to show you was in photos, so I’m just going to post some up here…

Sydney Crew with Mish before the workout - already pumped to go!

Getting into it!!!!!

Why am I smiling? Oh right, a break in the routine!!

We did it!! Sydney Crew AFTER shot!! (What is UP with my face?!?!!!)

It was a brilliant morning and I was so glad I got to go. It truly was a celebration of the 14.1kgs I managed to drop on my own. I thoroughly enjoyed working out with others and hope that they can do similar things during the rounds (not just at end, that’d be awesome!)

Up until the Friday, I wasn’t going to be attending the finale party. We couldn’t afford it, nor could we find babysitters. Through the generosity and luck I was given a ticket by a fellow 12WBTer! (Thanks Diana)

It was a wonderful night and I was truly inspired by the people who were there. The night was a definite affirmation for me to come back next round and to smash my final weight loss before possibly getting into a Lean & Fit program. If they can, then I definitely can!

Me all dressed and ready to go!!!

***as a follow-up, I am now giving this dress away! Dare I say it, it was too big!! I spent all night making sure the top wasn’t falling apart or off and letting everything hang out! Even the Hollywood tape failed me!!! Another cause for celebration!!!***

and now…. the official round of 12wbt is over and the pre-season of the new round doesn’t start until mid-January, but that’s not stopping me! I still have just under 10 kilos to goal and I’m giving myself a head start. So without further ado .. another update:

This whole experience has been a change for life. So many small things are making sense and are making a difference. I recently read something on my Facebook written by a health advisor. She said something to the effect of: Use your calories like you would with money. Budget them. Don’t give up the things you really love, if you don’t want to, but instead put them within your budget.  I truly believe this is also a successful way to help you out. If you aren’t ready to give up the things you’re attached to, then don’t. Just be accountable for them, but also remember to think – does my body need this to survive, or am I just eating this because I’m emotionally attached to it!?! Food for thought.

This has been my mini mantra throughout - it just makes sense!!!

AND WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS..this is WILDLY APPROPRIATE:

Thanks so much for reading about this journey. I hope in some way I’ve helped you out in your own journeys. I’ve appreciated all the wonderful words and signs of support. It’s meant so much to me! I’ll be back next round to blog lots and I’ll also be adding a vlogging component to the site. It’ll be easier for me to talk things out and you’ll be able to see me in all my tired, exhausted worked out glory!! Hope to see you then!!

It’s the End… but it’s only just begun

Hi Everyone! GUESSSSSSSSSSSS WHAT?????????????

I DID IT!! I survived to tell the tale of my 12 week body transformation journey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe it’s been three months already?? I can’t!! There have been bumps in the road, there have been teeny tiny set-backs, but in the end…there was joy!

It’s been a crazy ride and I’m not ready to get off yet! I still have a goal to achieve and am starting again tomorrow, from scratch! We’re putting the results of these 12 weeks aside, and we are going for gold again!

Soooo… here’s the summary:

If you’d have given me ANY of those numbers at the beginning of the program I would probably have scoffed at you!! I sit and stare at my before and after photos, still in disbelief!!! I am well on my way to being the person I want to be, and this program has been it for me.

I am going to blog more very very soon about feelings, but for now I just wanted to give you the final results!!! Thanks for coming along with me and for reading and commenting and blogging and texting and inspiring ME to be the best version of me!

Kicking the Can’t Be F***ed Days Away

Last week I had a severe case of the can’t-be-fucked’s (probably not even a word, but it is in my vocab!)

On reflection, I’m thinking those feelings and the ones I have at the moment are a result of lack of sleep.  Who knew sleep was so vital?

For the first time in a long time I went out and enjoyed some mid-week socializing! I attended an EP Launch for a singer I have recently discovered, named Matt Corby. A lot of you may know him from his Australian Idol days, but I didn’t have any idea he was even on the show, up until a few months ago! Anyway, whilst there with friends I indulged in a couple of cocktails. (Thank goodness for the AM work-out!) The cocktails were so yummy! I remember why I love them so much, just not loving the sugar content!!!!! I ended up in bed at 2am and then the next morning was up just after 6 with the kids.  It was the beginning of my two days of falling off the wagon.

For the next two days I decided I just ‘couldn’t be bothered’ working out. I have no idea why after 11 weeks my mind was slipping into this, but again, I’m putting it down to lack of sleep. It had been a few days of late nights, early mornings.  Luckily, on Saturday I attended a run clinic and was able to learn some pretty valuable techniques on efficient running. Although we didn’t do a lot of practical work, it was enough to kick-start my brain and body into get-back-int0-it mode and I realized that while taking the two days off of training was okay, it wasn’t acceptable as a long-term action.  I’ve never ever been a morning person (right, Mum?!) but throughout this program I’ve felt really good about getting up early and getting my workouts over with. This stopped for a few days and I very much enjoyed staying in bed that little while longer!! Unacceptable!

After having the two days off my body was a bit slow to get off the pace. Amazing what happens when you’ve been doing something for so long and then you just stop. Yesterday I finally rid the CBF’s by heading down to the park for a “Pain in the Park” session. I thought it was going to be boxing, but was just as glad that it was an hour circuit workout. Seeing the numbers on the HRM encouraged me to keep going and I felt so much better after it (even if I did still feel really tired). I took off for a quick jog/run around the park and ended up sticking to just under 1km before I realised I probably shouldn’t push myself.

This morning I had to give myself a mental pep-talk and repeat JFDI over and over. It’s the end of the challenge and for some reason I seem to be sabotaging myself by not caring and not wanting to work out. A ridiculous sentiment, considering how far along I’ve come. In the next few weeks as we head into Christmas, we’ll be without the ‘official’ program. Whilst that scares me a little, I know that the mind-set lessons and the knowledge I have gained these last few months will help me to prepare and be organised.  The moral of the story is to JUST F***EN DO IT!! Right? Right? YES!!!! Because saying that you’ll just leave it and doing it ‘tomorrow’ will not get the results today…. 

When I realized I’ve had the CBF’s, I needed to find a way to get myself out of the funk. What was it that would keep me going? I’ve concluded, it’s music. I am loving my re-emergence into the music scene, and especially the folk type music, or any cute guy with a guitar (call me shallow, I say it’s appreciation of talent *nods lots and lots*) I’ve been able to get lost and let my brain shut down and click into go mode by listening to the sweet sounds…And just because you’re here reading this, I feel the need to share some wonderful music with you!

Matt is such a raw and brilliant voice. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting lost in the haunting sounds…

and check out this new guy I also saw and met at the show. An awesome Aussie talent that needs loads of recognition. His songs are powerful and hold such strong messages: Jack Carty

Thanks for reading the mess of words. I thought it important that you know I’m far from perfect and I struggle a lot. The one thing that keeps me going is knowing that during the struggles and the times I just don’t want to go on, I’ve managed to lose over 13.5 kilos. I’m standing taller and I’m smiling more. To me, that alone is worth every struggle and challenge I set myself, both mentally and physically. Don’t forget: If I can do it, so can you!

P.S I felt it important to write this post out and not re-read over it. If I read over it, I would no doubt delete, change or modify what was written. These are my feelings in all their raw glory. For that, I apologise if it’s a bit muddled!!

Wednesday Weigh-In Week 11 + Revisiting Goals and Expectations

It’s week 11 of the 12 week body transformation program that I signed up for. I can’t believe it’s been almost 3 months.  In pre-season we set goals for ourselves. As this round comes to a close I thought it would be good to go back and see what the ‘pre-season’ goals I had written for myself were, and to check out how far along I had come. Well then, wasn’t I a low expectation setter!!!

1 month goal: lose 1-2kgs – run ANY distance without huffing and puffing — CHECK

3 month goal: lose 5kgs – Run without needing to stop after a few minutes – CHECK
Buy a pair of jeans in the ‘normal’ section – CHECK

6 month gaol: lose 10kgs – Run 4kms without stopping

As you can see, I blitzed 1 & 3 month goals and need a heavy re-evaluation!! As for the 6 month goal, I still have 3 months to get to the 4kms without stopping, but that should be helped along with the Run Clinic I’m doing this weekend through Mind Body Motion Fitness Solutions.

My new goals are to run as many fun-runs as I can leading up to a half-marathon. I’m thinking of giving myself about 6 months for this goal.

As for the weight – the numbers are in for this week! I’ve been pushing myself on the weekends and again, hit the 1000 calorie mark on Saturday and then attended a Boxing training class at the park on Sundays with a program called Pain in the Park with AC Fitness. Combined with at-home workouts and eating well I’ve lost more weight this week!

After yesterdays post I’ve had time to reflect and come to realise that I do need to be concentrating on how far I’ve come, instead of how far I want to go. In working towards success I must also celebrate the victories that I’ve achieved. I’ve said previously that you must celebrate the small things, in order to see the big picture. Looking at these numbers I surely can say without a doubt that I am smiling at my success.

If ever there was a time where I thought I would doubt myself, or I thought that I’d just do it tomorrow, it’s now. I’ve stepped up the plate and I’ve met the challenges set out for us and the changes that needed to happen, head on. I always seem to go into things enthusiastically and full-force, and I believe in one of the earlier posts I mentioned that I often start to fade and end up missing out on the completion of tasks. Or I get distracted and move onto other things. I decided to join up for this round because I knew I needed the help to stay focused and I needed the right person to tell me how it is and what to do. Seriously, this program has been that. A life-saver really.

I can’t say that this has been easy to do, but the moment I took control and responsibility of my actions it did become a lot, lot easier.

In saying that, it actually wasn’t all that hard to stop doing the things we’d been doing to sabotage ourselves. I remember a couple of months ago, my husband and I decided to add up a ‘typical Sunday’ in regards to food. A typical day when we didn’t really watch our food or portion sizes and we thought we were doing good, because we were having salad with dinner… I was HORRIFIED to see that it all added up to over 4000 calories!! I can’t believe I was putting that through my body, then sitting and being miserable because I felt so fat!!! The lessons in mind and body that this program has taught me have become so invaluable to me. Only last night my husband and I were discussing food and I pointed to a nice dessert in a magazine saying that it looked really good. He actually said to me that it didn’t really appeal to him. I nearly fell off my chair. This is the dessert man and the man who would sit and eat a whole block of chocolate, not three months ago! It’s as if our body chemistry has changed and we no longer crave that manufactured food!!  What a bloody wonderful thing that is!!! Although I did say I could go one of those gorgeous french pastries you find in the boutique bakeries!!!!

I’m a  huge believer in the program and if you want to change, then I say go for it. Do it. But know this…You have to commit over 100 % of yourself to the program and the lessons. Nobody can do it for you and nobody can change you, but yourself. People can ‘help’ you along with support and such, but in the end it’s you that has to do the hard work. It won’t happen overnight, but it will happen *insert hair flick!* and although times might get tough and you might want to give-up, it’s a lifestyle change,  not just a fad and not just an in-the-moment-ideal…a new way of life.. a new lease on life! Creating the best version of me that I possibly can.

The weather lately hasn’t been the best. We’ve gone from hot-as-hell to rainy-and-want-to-stay-in-bed weather! This morning was a definite CBF day but I thought I better get down and do something! Pilates seems to be my go-to when I’m in one of those moods. Rather than a high-cal burn it’s still stretching and toning muscles. It’s usually a quick and easy work-out except for this morning. The kids were in cuddly moods too! I just wanted to show you, to prove that YOU can do it too, that work-outs can be done when you have kids, you just have to adapt!!

       

My Progress in Pictures

This week during the 12WBT we had a weekly surprise to do a video/word blog of our progress so far, and what the program has meant to us. It had to be under 3 minutes, which can be a little difficult when you have a lot to say like I do!  I did a quick 3 minute video that can be found here:

 

I went out for a mid-day workout and during my Super Session Saturday inspiration struck and I came up with an idea for another, longer video. This one expresses a little bit more about how much this has meant to me and what it’s doing to make me who I am. It’s just over 6 minutes, so it didn’t qualify for the ‘challenge’, but I’m kinda happy with it. I hope you enjoy.

 

 

Mini Milestone Week 8 Smashed

My running bib and spot prize "visor" I won

Holy Grilled Cheesus what have I done?!?! That’s exactly what I thought Saturday morning after picking up our running bib and timing chip for the Brooks Spring into Shape Race 2, at Parramatta Park. You see, my husband and I talked ourselves into changing our distance from 4km to 8km!!!

It’s been seven years since I’ve ‘ran’ any distance of length and I guess I was up for the challenge??  Definitely up for the challenge! It was a beautiful Sydney morning and hubs and I had left the kids at the in-laws and headed into Parramatta. Due to changing the distance we had time up our sleeves, so we popped home and had a quick coffee! Nothing like that little extra oomph to help out! I was actually nervous. I knew in my heart that I could do this, but it was such a big step. I’d been on YouTube checking out running videos and technique to brush up and to prevent injury, and I was raring to go!

Watching everyone come over the line for the 4k race was great and I tried to clap for everyone, knowing that it’s such a huge effort to get out and do any type of distance. I spent the 20 minutes before the start reining in my excitement and nervous energy so that I could use it to my advantage!

Hubs and I at the START - why are we smiling?? We're crazy! We're just about to torture ourselves and we're smiling!

A quick group warm-up and we were ready. I would say there were about a hundred participants, and when the buzzer went off, we all pushed forward.  I had my iPod on and my ‘running track’ music pumping the whole way. The km markers seemed like they were a great distance apart (ha-ha, yeah yeah, I Know, they were 1k apart!!) but each time I saw them I pushed that little bit harder. Going around the first time and onto the second lap I knew I’d made the right choice to change to the 8k. I felt extremely determined. I wasn’t worried about my time, although I was trying to get less than 8 minutes because that is what I’d been doing on my regular flat runs.

The scenery was lovely (erm..I may be talking about the shirtless footy players that had finished training, sorry hunnnni!!) One of the great things about running is anyone can do it! There were so many people of different ages, different shapes and sizes!  With each step I took I knew that this was the right choice for my mini-milestone. As I was coming onto the 7k marker, my iPod switched to “This is the best thing that has ever happened to me” and I couldn’t help but break into a huge smile. This whole journey, the 12WBT journey, has truly been the best journey I’ve had in a very, very, very, very, long time, if not ever!   My husband had left me behind half way through, he’s taller and slightly faster and I didn’t want to hold him back! It was really great to run into the final few metres and have him with me, smiling and encouraging me!!!

The adrenaline shot through me as I crossed the finish line, knowing I had finished it! I had run the 8kms in approximately 1 hour 2 minutes! (There’s been a glitch in the system and my time hasn’t been recorded. I sent an email and they’re having the timing manager look into it).  I walked a few times, to catch my breath and recover, but I am really happy with my efforts!

We did IT!!! Now we can smile and have a valid reason!!! Mini-milestone SMASHED!

I just want everyone to know that being in the right frame of mind and challenging yourself will reap the most awesome benefits!!! I feel great and can’t wait until we do our next event!  I’m also going to do a running clinic at the end of the month, to get to the right ‘tools’ to succeed. I’m definitely looking forward to that!

I have a Secret

At the beginning of this discovery, I had a goal. There was a goal to lose as much weight as possible, hopefully in the end, 20 kilos. There was also a tee is my drawer that had lived there for a very long time. It’s a ‘South Sydney Rabbitohs Women’s Fitted Tee’ and I have stared longingly at it for the better part of a year, trying it on and seeing it stick to my skin. Ugh. I refused to wear it, because it was horrible and it made me feel incredibly fat. As you know, I’ve lost around 10 kilos but quite often, I struggle with actually realising how much of an effort that really is. I grabbed the shirt the other day and I tried it on, curious to see if it finally fit. The joy I felt as it slipped over everything and DIDN’T cling! I was so excited!  Much to my Bulldog supporting, husband’s disgust, I could finally support my favourite Bunnies in public!!

I took a photo for evidence, and was actually impressed with what I saw. In all honesty, I didn’t even recognise myself. I still have a long way to go (in problem areas) but I promptly posted the pic on my Facebook account to share in my celebrations. From that, I received a lot of, “You look great, tell me how you did it?” and “What’s your secret?” I had to have a little giggle at the Secret question. These types of questions were obviously coming from people who haven’t been following my journey closely.  For those that have, you may already know the secret. For those that haven’t, I’m ready to finally reveal it. I’m about to tell you the secret to my success so far, but I can’t make any promises that you are going to like what I have to say.

The ways to lose weight successfully, according to what I’ve learnt:

You can’t just eat whatever you like

You have to count your calories 

You have to be accountable for ALL FOOD you eat, including the bad stuff

You have to sit up and take responsibility for the things you do

You have to stay focused on what you eat
(it doesn’t mean you’ll be eating rabbit food all day!)

You have to move……

Burning calories is the way to lose it and keep it off

You have to work-out in some form, 6 days a week

(that’s right, I said 6 days. I think this is the one that people will really cringe at. The crux of it is, not a lot of people want to do the work. To me that reads, not a lot of people are serious about changing themselves.)

I have been successful because I have made an effort to move around, jump around, burn calories six days a week. It takes determination and it takes a lot of focus, and me talking myself into it. I am not a morning person and in fact, I love my sleep, however as these results have started showing, I can honestly say that I love losing weight a lot more. I grumble, I groan and I complain to myself about having to do it, but there’s no other way to get the weight off, except for good old hard work. I know you want a magic pill, you want a super duper, awesome machine that you buy on tv, but I have used none of them. Before you turn around and say to me, I don’t have time, know that I have three children aged 1, 2 and 4. Even I have time to work-out. I have a few work-out DVDs and I use work-out apps on my phone. My current favourite is the Nike Training App (super awesome work-outs with prompts, videos and rewards!)

Another secret I’ve learnt is that you can talk to everyone about this journey and how you’ve done it, until your blue in the face. You can preach and try to convert them but……. No one is going to do anything until they are ready. I know that for the longest time I sat and said, “I want to lose weight” but I too didn’t want to do the work. I wasn’t serious about it. I’m serious now and as a result, I am seeing results. You have to commit. Plain and simple. Commit to a better you and it will happen.

Wednesday Weigh-In Week 7

It’s a double celebration today and a very busy one, so just a quick blog post—I’ll do a more detailed one tomorrow, I have a few things I want to say!

First off, it’s my youngest daughters 1st birthday!! I can’t believe a year has gone by, but she is a joy and is truly a very happy baby—which makes my life a lot easier, especially with the other 2 terrors gorgeous darlings!

In typical style, she enjoys the cheap stacking cups over the expensive doll!

 

I’ve also FINALLY DONE IT! It’s taken 7.5 weeks of commitment and focus but I’ve finally done it! I’ve cracked the 10kg loss!!! “Officially, it’s 10.1kgs” and I am more than thrilled!  It was actually unexpected as I’ve felt myself feeling a little unfocused and slipping in regards to socialisation.  I’ve managed to start wearing Size 14 work-out gear and whilst it is ‘snug’, I can still move in it and don’t remember the last time I’ve worn 14. I must admit, I am very unimpressed with the clothing styles/sizes though. I’ve tried on other things that are 16-18 and they haven’t really ‘fit well’. I’m just going to keep going and not purchase any clothes until I can fit into a comfortable 12, at least!!!

 

 

 

 

I checked out my BMI and to move from Obese to Overweight I only need 1.7 points… that’s a little bit exciting!

My mini-mantra is focus, believe, achieve…. I don’t remember who says it, but they were spot on! It’s about being mature, not letting your inner-voice pout and tell you that it’s okay to eat what you don’t need, or to not exercise today, and it’s also about wanting something so bad that you’ll commit to it.  It’s all about organisation as well! Know what’s coming up (whether it be a party, a night out or a picnic), plan for it, and make your choices around it. That way, you will succeed and continue to!

Weigh-In Week 6 and Emotions-a loaded 8 letter word

Emotions—how one 8 letter word can mean so many things, or have such a huge impact on me is amazing. I feel that this week I’ve been emotionally fragile and on that ever riding non-stop rollercoaster of life, where the highs and lows never seem to fade.

I often go through and re-read my posts in the blog, to see how I’m going and where I’ve come from. I’m glad I do that, and I’m glad I have this to make it possible. I’ve found that some of the things I’ve written, I’ve actually forgotten I was feeling or experiencing.  I also noticed that at the beginning of the program and blog I was relying heavily on expressing emotions. You can see that from the little icons I would put at the bottom of the post.

Although I might say “I’m alright,” quite often it doesn’t mean internally I am. That was until this week. ((TMI warning)) It’s TTOTM (If you have to ask, you must be male!!?!?) and I’ve been feeling extremely flat and blah (refer to last post). I often get extremely lethargic and am in a lot of pain and do not feel enthusiastic about life at all. It’s one of those weeks of curling into a ball and sleeping and escaping. I’m happy to report that’s the old me! I did pout a little, feel a little sorry for myself and do a little scale hopping this week *slaps self on hand-we talked about this!* and I saw that the scales were moving in the up, up, up direction. Instead of pouting and getting shitty about it, I put on my tunnel vision and knew that lazing around, feeling sorry for my self would do nothing but make those numbers stay there, so I got off my arse and exercised. I kept it pretty light this week, but I still moved. I paid particular attention to the food I ate. I’m human; I’m normal. I had those terrible TTOTM cravings and wanted sugary, sweet, fatty useless food. My weekly confession: I tried 1/12th (yes, a tiny smidgen) of a piece of choc iced sprinkle donut that was bought over by a friend (who didn’t know any better). That one tiny bite was DISGUSTING! I couldn’t believe that I didn’t enjoy it at all. It was gross and the flavours sat on my tongue in a most unpleasant way. BOOM—at least we can tick that crappy food off my want list now! Last night I grabbed a handful of ‘hot chips’ that were in front of me (5 in total) and ate them, thinking they’d be yummy and delicious. Anyone who was around last night, when I did this, knows what happened. They were soooo gross. Even grosser than the donut! I felt oil in my mouth and I felt like I’d swallowed a cup full of oil and it sat in my stomach. I actually got nauseous and wanted to go and throw up. Lesson learned. My body is telling me I don’t need it and my mind has finally clicked.

You may “think” you want it, and the emotions that we all experience will convince as that we “want” it, but our body doesn’t “need” it and soon, you won’t even like it. How exciting, right? I think so!

Basically, what I’ve been rambling on about is the fact that Michelle says to “take the emotion out of it” — become disciplined and conscious of what you’re eating. Nowhere in the program does it say you can’t enjoy food. I enjoy food, quite a lot. I never thought I’d say I was looking forward to Lentil Spaghetti Bolognaise, but it’s one of my favourite menu items. Plan, be organised and you won’t be placed in a situation where you might make bad choices.

 The other most important thing I’ve learned from this week is to Never Give Up. It’s true to say that when things  seem ‘too hard,’ you just want to throw in the towel and give up, say screw it, why bother? It’s quite possible to  convince yourself that if the scales don’t move, then it’s not worth it and you’ve just worked out for  nothing…..Well there’s a reason to bother and it isn’t just that fact that you’ll feel such a difference in your life.  Your body, your attitude, everything will change—for the better. I’m not perfect and I’m not emotionless, but I know a journey worth going on is a journey full of experience and wonders and discovery.

Who wants to know about weigh-in?!?!?

YAY!!!!! Hard work and consistency DOES pay off. I am so excited about the results. I had set myself up to not be emotional if there was no loss, or a gain, because I knew that I was having my ‘off’ week. The results have just made me even more determined. I am 1.2kgs off of a 10kg loss. I’m writing this down to be accountable–I want that 1.2kgs gone next weigh-in!  I am also ‘officially’ down 1 pant size. I can fit into pants I haven’t worn in years and the current jeans I have keep falling down. Wooooo!! *throws sparkles in the air–the sprinkley kind, not my new phone!*

Thanks for all the support — I seriously love it and it helps to keep me in check and encourage me. I know that only I can do this and only I can decide what I eat and how I exercise, but I love knowing that there are people out there who might read this and think that if I can do it, they can do it, because quite frankly, it’s true — YOU CAN!!!!!!

And if you have one of those days where things seem like crap and you don’t think you can go on–do this:

Weekend Quote

 

Who am I? What have I done with myself? Where’s the old me? To be honest, I’m starting to figure out who I am, I’m starting to realise I’ve put that other person away, for life, and the old me has turned into the new me. I’m not talking about a miraculous body transformation-that takes time, but I am talking about the person who got out of bed on a Saturday morning and by 8.30am had already completed Jillian Michaels Ripped Week 2 and a 20 minute Zumba session! All before the girls were awake! I feel revitalised!

Although the last two days have been quite emotional and I’ve felt really low I know that I have needed to push through these feelings and know that it’s a change, it’s a life-style and it will make me better. It already has.

I’m not that person who wants to stay in bed all day. I’m not that person who would rather eat pizza than cook something quickly (or find a healthy fast alternative) and I’m not this person who say’s Fuck It, I Give Up.  Be the best person you can be and don’t give up…ever.

P.S – if you know who said this quote I’d love to know. It feels very Jillian to me, but I’ve googled and can’t seem to come up with an answer